Using the Law of Attraction When Your Life Is Messed Up

Using the Law of Attraction may seem like a bit of a stretch when you are in an abusive relationship and trying to figure out how to survive and what to do. Here is what I learned. If you would like to read the transcript for this video please find it below the video to read it while you are listening or read it alone if you prefer.

The longer and more I work with the Law Of Attraction and also let go of beliefs that I have held that no longer serve me, the more I realize how easy it is to improve my life and get what I want in my life.

It did take me a while to get to this place. The way I behaved, thought, and felt, before my understanding of how powerful the Law Of Attraction was very different than before I knew this.

In theory, yes we can change our course in life overnight but in practice, this is probably not going to happen and that’s okay.

I know there are a lot of well-meaning LOA believers out there who feel the need to let everyone dealing with some ‘heavy’ stuff know how simple it truly is, and just tell them to ‘be love and light ’ or that they already have all they need within, etc…, but this isn’t helpful when you are struggling with an abusive relationship. 

 I wholeheartedly agree that LOA is simple and it works, but this isn’t the least bit useful or helpful for women who are significantly struggling with life and are in an abusive relationship. 

I certainly thought that this line of thinking is so far away from what I needed to hear at the time I was in an abusive relationship. ” Effortless LOA”, and how easy it should be just makes us feel worse about ourselves because it doesn’t seem easy, and we are struggling with a serious situation now. 

All those negative thoughts and feelings we are having. It makes us worry that things can’t get better unless we somehow feel good every second of the day, but this isn’t necessary or true to start seeing changes.

We’re all just human beings, doing the best we can and it is not always obvious to us as to why we have made the choices we make in our life. We might have grown up with people who passed on distorted beliefs to us which eventually became our own and this was all before the age of 7. Then life circumstances continued and certain things happened to taint our view of life and we developed even more limiting beliefs. Our beliefs became further rooted in our subconscious minds based on things happening in the world around us. Unfortunately, there is always plenty of negativity to support our beliefs which provide proof in our minds that solidify the beliefs.

You feel trapped in a nightmare, constantly worrying, feeling like there is something wrong with you. You have messed up again you say, or worse you have realized you are in an abusive relationship which can lead to feelings of poor self-esteem, hopelessness, and despair. It seems the worse it gets the worse it gets.  

If you are starting your work with LOA from this far down the on the scale of consciousness starting with the usual applications of the LOA principles will probably not work for you.

You will need to do some work to get your vibration up, to get things moving in a more positive direction for you so you do not give up, and say ” LOA does not work for me” and miss how your life can change dramatically. 

See my article on ” Raising Your Vibration ” on the website here under Healing Blog: https://debbianderson.com/you-can-raise-your-consciousness/

But here are some of my tips for working with LOA from a really low level of consciousness to get you going. These tips also help those of you who are higher up the vibrational scale but still are struggling. 

Be Aware Of Where You Are Now and Know It’s Okay

You may feel some resistance against your bad feelings with all the talk of how important it is to feel good to get LOA working for you instead of against you. You will probably be upset that these feelings are there but they are there; you’ll be mad at yourself for feeling them, and that you let things get so out of control. 

The idea that we can create our reality is very powerful, but it can also lead to self-judgment for not figuring this out before. You may dwell on how much suffering you could have avoided if you had done things differently or sooner, but this is not helpful to you.

This is all understandable, but don’t beat yourself up too much. Life is kind of a mess right now for you, but it is not your fault. 

Your feelings are what they are and you may not like them but when we stop resisting and judging ourselves for things we have done or feeling bad, we greatly cut back on our suffering, which comes from what we are responding to not what has actually happened. 

Being hard on ourselves for not being happy is certainly not an effective way to bring more positive feelings to you.

Beginning to recognize what you are even feeling is a good start. Writing these feelings down in a journal is the next step and then you can dig down a bit deeper as to what may be the root as to what is going on to uncover the underlying beliefs you have been carrying around. You may be surprised to find the beliefs you have are very deep and most of us all carry beliefs that we are not worthy, we are not enough, or we do not deserve to be loved, even by ourselves. 

This is the place I began my deeper work on myself and with the help of someone who taught me how to heal from within I healed from the effects of a very abusive relationship. 

Moving Into Better Feeling Thoughts

This is very important to shift your reality. Choosing better feeling thoughts seems too simple but it is key. When you have been feeling really bad, this process can take more time and be a bit more slow-going but that is okay.

It’s a lot easier for someone whose life is not in the depths of despair, and who wants to get higher up the consciousness scale, to move into a better place emotionally than someone who is going through some very rough stuff, like trying to get to a place where you feel strong enough and worthy enough to leave an abusive partner. 

Choosing a better feeling thought does not mean you have to be happy and serene, it means you start reaching for a thought or two that helps you feel less sad, hopeless, or in complete despair. ” This day started off being hell but now I have a few minutes to drink this tea alone and enjoy the sun shining down.” Think anything that makes you feel better for the moment when things feel very dark. ” I found I would think of some little things I was grateful for helped me think of more things which gave me some relief and I had a shift in my negative thinking. For example, this is what I thought ” I love my cats. Just having them around makes me feel like I am not alone.” It may seem ridiculous and a stretch but it does work. 

Here’s the thing about thoughts—They are manifestations too.

What pops into our minds is based on our current vibration, so when you raise yours, you will be ‘delivered’ thoughts that match this higher vibration. There will be less work to do in terms of generating ‘better’ thoughts because they will come to you automatically.

Don’t force yourself to say affirmations or adopt a line of thinking that sounds good but feels anything but. You want to work on actually feeling better, not just pretending you do. That is the difference between true positive thinking and resistance. 

Don’t Deny Your Current Reality Worrying It Will Send The Wrong Message

As time went on I learned more about the Law of Attraction and doing something called acting ” as if”. This means feeling good now, feeling, and acting like what you want is already yours. This is true because creation is now, so you need to raise your vibration now. You can’t tell yourself you’ll feel better once you get what you want. You can’t have a sense of need around your desire. Feel and act like you have what you want now. 

So, it is easy to see that having your struggles now can be a problem attraction wise because you are not acting ” as if”. If you take your focus off what is happening in your life and that is hard to do I know, but if you can start to do this the LOA will fix it. By giving it our attention, we will just get more of the same misery and hardship but if you begin to shift your focus just a bit you will change your situation and bring more of what you do want. 

 Attraction is based on how we are feeling, not what we are saying, thinking, and doing.

So, if you are having major relationship problems, you are in an abusive relationship, for example, and you fear looking at your future and do not know what that will look it or how to change it. Stop and think for a minute about your situation from a ‘feeling’ perspective.

How is this making you feel? Of course, it is making you feel anxious, fearful, and even panicky, you are thinking about it day and night. 

Now, think about how it would feel to have a clear understanding that none of this is your fault, you are in an abusive relationship, and that is the first step to getting out of it. 

It is important to read what abuse is, abusive relationships, and understand what is happening to you now, knowing you are not alone and that you are not out of your mind. I did not even know I was being abused until my friends told me. My partner was so deceptive. 

Call an Abuse Support Line as they are available 24 hours a day, speak to your physician, and get a referral to a therapist. Tell a trusted friend or family member what is going on. Make a safety plan so you can get out of the house if you need to right away.  

I am sure those things would make you feel really good and that is what we are talking about.

It may be hard to do some of these things but if you fear admitting to the bad stuff happening it will send the wrong message. Admit to what is happening so you can do whatever it takes to make yourself feel better because this is the way to things changing in your life. 

Don’t Worry about Dreaming Big Right Now

Can you go from being in the pit of despair to a happy and peaceful life? Yes. 

Can you go from barely hanging on to feeling better than you have had for months? Absolutely. 

When you understand how attraction works, you realize anything is possible for us so long as we adopt a belief system that supports this type of awesomeness. We also need to realize our current and past circumstances have absolutely no significance on what is possible for the future.

But, again, you want to work with the process in a way that actually makes you feel good, and it is perfect if you don’t shoot for the stars right out of the gate. If you are currently struggling in your relationship which is abusive, you may have visions of leaving and staying with a friend or family because that is all you can really think about in a way that feels okay, and doesn’t activate a lot of resistance.

If you are a woman who found the courage to leave your abusive husband, and you are in a bad way financially, you may have your sights set on any job that will give you enough money to pay your rent and put food on the table. It’s okay you aren’t setting your sights on becoming the next big female entrepreneur right now where you are.

Again, things can only improve if we are feeling better, and you want to focus on goals that evoke this feeling. And as you see things start falling into place, your faith in this whole LOA thing will strengthen, and then you will realize the sky is the limit. 

Be Kind With Yourself

Be extremely proud of yourself that you have decided to raise your consciousness; many people never make this decision. They are very entrenched in their negative belief systems, and can’t possibly see another way than the one they are living. 

We have a lot of beliefs to shift, and that won’t happen overnight. As you move along your path, other beliefs will begin to rise to the surface and they need to be dealt with as your desires get bigger and bolder.

You’ll still have hard days. The ‘old’ beliefs won’t go away so quickly and you will need to find a way to release them and then replace them with new beliefs. You’ll have days when you don’t feel as great, but they will become less and less. You may also have days that think all of this is complete BS. Be compassionate with yourself as you grow. 

You are a master of your human experience, and you will get this and it will change your life. Show yourself some love. Forgive yourself for things you need to. Be grateful for even the small things you have been given in your life. Celebrate all your victories, good decisions, and manifestations, no matter how small they may be.

So here is my take on how I used and how you can use LOA when you are in a really low place. 

Much love to you. 

Debbi

More to come about the Powerful Law Of Attraction and how it changed my life and still does. 

Remember this: ” Let Love Guide You Not Fear. “

If you would like to reach out to me. Please do so on Facebook or Instagram here via DM:

 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/innerlibera

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/InnerLibrationHealer/

Leave a Comment